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The Chattahoochee in the fall- Cherokee for " river of painted rock"

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Saturday, October 31, 2009

It all started with Chloe visiting Savannah- Chloe and her abductor at Forsyth Park in Savannah
chloeandsamforsythepark.JPGMy youngest son Sam needed my help moving to another apartment in Savannah, so Chloe and I went down to assist in the moving and bring excess furniture back. I should have never fell for it. Once Chloe was exposed to the smells of all those old parks in Savannah, she longed to return. Since Sam was to be living by himself, it was a natural fit for Chloe to move to Savannah. When I started The Decision there was no such thing as our other dog, Penelopee. Chloe and Penelopee became close friends, my wife and I fell in love with the Lab, and that's when my son strategically asked,"Can Chole come to visit me in Savannah? She can stay with me until I come home for my birthday." That was about the last we've seen of the Chlomiester. "She loves long walks on the beach at Hilton Head", he tells us. "Girls love her", he tells us. Meanwhile all of our attention is now directed at the Pompie and I don't know if we will ever get Chloe back or for that matter, if Chloe will ever want to come back. So...all the stuff I was doing with Chloe in the book, I am now doing with Peppi; a Chloe clone so to speak.
31 oct 09 @ 12:53 pm          Comments

Thursday, October 29, 2009

A "good fit"

A urologist is examining a male patient and much to his surprise sees that the man has five "you know whats." "My goodness Sir. In my many years of practicing Urology, I don't believe I have seen ever anything like this!  It must be a problem getting clothing for your particular anatomy. I am curious, for instance, how do your pants fit?"

The patient replies with a smile,"Like a Glove!"

29 oct 09 @ 7:26 am          Comments

Monday, October 26, 2009

Where's Chloe?

A  lady with a dead rabbit asks the Vet," Is my rabbit dead?"

"Yes he says. It is dead. That will be $20.00."

"$20? You did not do anything. How do you know he's dead?"

"Would you like me to do some tests?"

"Why yes. I love this rabbit. I want to be sure."

The Vet brings in a cat that sniffs the rabbit, and then leaves. 

The Vet brings in a Chocolate Lab and she also sniffs the rabbit and leaves.

The Vet then says, "Your rabbit is dead! That will be $120.00 dollars!"

"$120.00? Are you kidding? For what?"

The Vet responds,"For the Cat scan and Lab tests I had to do."

For two weekends, I took our Chocolate Lab Penelopee to my office for a picture to accompany this joke. It took about twenty shots and several cans of Alpo to get the picture seen here. Patients have loved the picture and the joke, and each time ask for the picture so they can tell the joke later with the "prop" and then take the picture away with them, necessitating me to print off another Cat scan and Lab test picture. Isn't  she's so pretty.......

On a later blog, I'll explain why people are asking "Where's Chloe?" She's fine. I just  don't have her anymore...for now...

26 oct 09 @ 6:38 pm          Comments

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Allen who?
My wife and I went to a wedding last p.m. and at the reception were talking to two friends. At one point in the conversation, the wife of this couple  said that she had heard I was writing  a book. "What is it about John?" Responding with a remark and a technique  I call "shock humor" I say with all seriousness, "Penile enlargement." At first taken aback but then finding the reponse very funny, she began to laugh. As we are laughing, the husband leans forward to discern why all the laughter, and asks, "Allen who?" I said, " P. Allen Largeman. You wouldn't know him."
25 oct 09 @ 7:53 am          Comments

Saturday, October 24, 2009

The Big Bag
bigbagorrignial.jpgWhen we came up with idea of the doctor as a patient illustrated by  a doctor with the tubing coming out of a lab jacket and into a bedside bed, the issue then became how to make the fluid look like urine. The photographer Travis Massey suggested apple juice, " Just bring the bag. I'll fill it up when you get here." He filled it to full capacity in order to get some of the apple juice into the bag and the tubing. This in turn made the bag much too full and prompted several funny remarks from people that saw the picture."Man, John. You must have had a real full bladder." "You must have really needed to go!" Placing the bag in the foreground further made the bag look big and full. Several weeks later at 7 am., and prior to surgery one morning, I went over to Travis's studio and in his parking lot filled a second bag with one can of Icehouse beer and one can of Bud Light. We did not worry about the tubing this time and only filled the bag half full;  better representing a  more real situation. This is the bag that is on the cover of the book. Travis took pictures of the new bag on an associate and then pasted it onto the original picture you see here for the final outcome. If you are wondering why the beer looks so much like urine, it goes back to the addage," You don't buy beer, you rent it."
24 oct 09 @ 5:44 pm          Comments

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